Well, Gosh...

It's an honor to be nominated as one of the Best NEW Homeschool Blog sites by The Homeschool Post.
I am in stellar company, thrilled to note that so many dedicated moms and fantastic writers are sharing their journeys as well. If you would like to vote for my blog, visit the voting page, find The Homeschool Regel, and click. Thanks!

If you are a first time visitor, welcome and thank you for joining me on my journey.

How I Do It

A common thread among homeschoolers is how to answer the inevitable question, "Why are you homeschooling?" For many, it elicits a defensive posture, perhaps because they have been challenged enough times or had someone close in their orbit express disapproval over the decision.

I have enough good reasons for homeschooling that I've never paused when asked this question. It doesn't occur to me that others might approve or disapprove. It's not really their business anyway so I don't worry about it. I've done school every which way with my kids and I am confident we have landed on what works best.

The comment that stops me is this: "How do you do it?"

Translated: "I could never..."

The spirit of awe, doubt, trepidation, or sheer disbelief frankly makes me a mite uncomfortable and maybe even a little sad. I get that the comment is often a compliment. But the truth is, you could  do this...if you had to. Which is what I have done.

When your child is suffering in public school, when you can't afford private school, when private school wouldn't solve the problem anyway, when no one "gets" your child like you do, you have to make a choice. I chose to homeschool. Not because I am so smart. Not because I am so capable. Not because I love spending 24/7 with my youngest. Not because I am a martyr. Not because I want to protect him from the outside world.

I just want my son to learn.

There are so many resources available now to help those of us who are new on this journey. I've spent hours combing homeschool help websites and read a daily queue of blogs written by the most amazing moms, telling of their successes and their near misses. I couldn't do this alone. Fortunately, I am not alone.

Of course, I would be remiss if I did not give the glory where it really belongs. I do not have the strength, the desire, the discipline, the smarts, or the patience to homeschool. But because it is what needs to be done, I've been given the gifts to make it happen. God alone strengthens this weak vessel. He provides all we need, when we need it, to do the thing we need to do.

Please, do not think more highly of me because I homeschool. Do not think less of yourself because you don't. If anything, be impressed by the power that fuels me. Because that is how I do it.

A Clean Mind Leads to Projectiles

Thank you Spring Break! Nothing like a week off to reflect and regroup...oh, and spring clean. My cupboards and shelves are nearly organized, door jams primed and ready to be repainted, and many treasures stacked and ready for next week's multi-family garage sale. There is something about purging the house that helps me purge and clear my mind.

As I mentioned in my last post, I felt we had gotten bogged down by our textbooks. I started hearing, "I hate science," which I know is a total lie because Mythbusters and How It's Made top the list of recorded programs on our DVR. What SJ was communicating, in his 13 year old manner, was that he hated what we were studying and how we were doing it.

It occurred to me that he likes anything that shoots, explodes, or destroys so, duh, brainchild, how about studying the weaponry and warfare of the Medieval times (which we are now entering in History)? With a little encouragement from my husband and his friend, I found a book, The Projectile-Throwing Engines of the Ancients, that offers sketches of many types of catapults and their histories. As we read this together, SJ will cover as many learning objectives, if not more, than if we were reading his history, science, and literature textbooks. I am hoping he can build scale models of a few of these catapults (or weapons) and we will (at least, my husband will) test and discuss the differences of trajectory, force, and all those scientific concepts of which I am glaringly lacking in understanding. In reading the history of the weapons, we will surely find terms to add to the vocab list and, in order to understand the concepts, he will be forced to take the time to comprehend his reading. He has already opened the book to peek.

I am also looking at curriculum for next year and, again, it occurred to me that I've been a little too intent on taking up where he left off in school and getting through the book. Well, it's clear he will be doing Pre-Algebra again next year. With every lesson, we tend to back up another chapter. So...why am I trying to move forward? STAR testing? For the rest of the year, I plan to start back at the front of the book and review until I find where he is stuck. I am also having him do some diagnostic tests on a few of the programs I am reviewing. If you have used these, please let me know: Aleks Pre-Algebra and Teaching Textbook.

Lastly, check out this post from another blogger mom where she outlines the lessons learned from, of all things, a Cheez-It box: Who Needs Textbooks?  Great minds think alike. Homeschool offers so many opportunities to learn about life from life itself.

Keeping Our Eyes on the Task at Hand.

For the most part we are falling into a routine, plugging along at SJ pace and learning to cover lessons with more quality than quantity. Really, it's the only way we can cover lessons unless I'm just into text-mentioning for my own benefit. Still, it's disheartening to me when we run unbidden into concepts that my son has no clue how to decipher, concepts he has been meant to work with in traditional school.

For instance, yesterday he faced a question asking if a term was a simile, a metaphor, an analogy, or an idiom. Blank stare. "Mom, my teacher expected me to know what these were but I have no idea." Add it to my growing list. Sigh.

Again, it reinforces why I am homeschooling this guy but still, it makes me sad and a wee bit overwhelmed at the scope of material we need to cover (and master). It makes me wonder, though, how many other kids are sitting in classrooms making WAGS (wild-a**-guesses) to get their "C" and move on. My son has a known learning issue that requires a unique delivery system and has resulted in lagging school knowledge. But sometimes the lines are blurred and I wonder how far behind he is... or isn't?

Our focus as homeschoolers needs to be our children's progress, not comparison. Still, it takes time to take the school out of school. I've been a lifelong classroom learner (a good one) so it is a daily choice to move against the grain of tradition in learning. I am so thankful that, personally, I've always been interested in psychology and brain function and learning styles so I have some understanding of what I am working with but the reality of doing said work often feels askew.

So we move on to another day, our focus on the trail head, not the top of the mountain (was that an analogy?). This journey will be long and strenuous but I am convinced the view will be well worth it.

I Knew I Was on to Something.

I just picked up a most interesting book: Poisoned Apple, The Bell-Curve Crisis and How Our Schools Create Mediocirity and Failure by Betty Wallace and William Graves. I am only 50-some pages in but am finding the premises of these first chapters make sense to me.

Let me just say that I am not one of those homeschoolers who is completely anti-public school. I have three kids--one a junior in college who spent 10.5 of 12 years in public school and another a sophomore who is doing "just fine" at the local high school. Because of my three individuals, I do have the unique perspective of having one who was on the verge of boredom for much of her schooling (until AP classes), one who is smarter than his classes but is perfectly fine with mediocrity but who will turn on the burners when needed, and one who perpetually chased the ship out to sea, never quite catching the current.

This book discusses how our public system teaches to the middle of a bell-curve that in reality does not exist. In a given classroom, if students were plotted according to their abilities, there would be a skewed curve with some at the top end of proficiency, some at the bottom, and a widely varying range of those in between. The authors contend, and here is where my blog title comes in, that in a perfect world schools would not group students according to grade level but according to learning readiness. My daughter will vouch for me when I say this is what I have always said!  I am anxious to read on and discover what solutions the authors present. I will let you know.

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I have been remiss in mentioning a few blog carnivals that were kind enough to mention my blog. Please check these out if you get a chance. There is a wealth of great writing among these listings:
The Homeschool Showcase
About.com Homeschooling

A Little Change of Scenery

How about this for a math venue? The time change seemed to have done a number on this one and wow, was he having a hard time concentrating. This worked better than the kitchen table! (That's the dog bed airing out in the backyard.)

First Week "Detox" Goals

As I look ahead to Week #1, I can see right away where the two of us might conflict. I'm amped. He's not.

Since embarking on this journey, I have immersed myself in a crash course of homeschooling, joining Yahoo Groups, reading books, scouring websites. All of this serves to excite the possibilities. I practically drooled as I perused our curriculum choices, so satisfied was I with the plethora of learning stimuli. Couple that with the uber cool interactive websites I keep finding and the thousand unbidden thoughts per second I have on ways we can study [whatever I happen to be reading/seeing]. It's like the sleeping giant awakened. I am ready to go after this thing, to instill in my son a new love of learning, to share with him the wonders of life.

One problem. Him.

Lest I forget, he is my student. And for the all the reasons listed in my first post I need to give him time to detox (or decompress) from his traditional school environment.

Challenge #1:

• Do school. But do it laid back-like. His pace, not mine.
• Set foundations. Subtly discover what he knows and what he is missing. Watch for hot points and be sensitive to what shuts him down.
• Slow down and go at his rhythm.

Here are some ways I think I can do this:

• Back away from the textbooks. I have them but I'm guessing the quickest way to produce eye glaze in my student will be to open the same textbook he currently "hates" and resume the same old lessons he thought he was leaving behind. I realize he needs to learn much of what is in the text, but throwing the book at him is precisely what has not worked. 
• Computer groundwork. I can see that the computer will be a fabulous tool. It can also be dangerous and overwhelming. Right now, he has a sum total of two sites he visits: Lego and Freeride (a game). I would like to be able to leave him with safe site choices when I have Mom errands and appointments. 
• Does he know how to make Folders and Bookmarks in the browser? We'll make Folders such as "Anytime" and "Funtime" and maybe a few more serious sounding ones like "Research" or "Text support." Then, we will load the "Anytime" folder with approved sites that offer educational videos and interactive games. It will give him the freedom to choose his activities and free me from having to set boundaries each time we hit the computer.
• Create a Facebook account. I know there are lots of opinions on this. My son is 13 and making the choice to leave his current social network. Getting a Facebook account was a dealmaker for him when deciding to homeschool. Of course, we (the parents) will stipulate the security settings, keep the password, and monitor his usage, but really, it's the way of his future (and ours) and gives him the illusion he has not left his social life behind.
• Set some ground rules.  Erasing History record will be grounds for computer banishment. Facebook is for fun, as in after goals have been completed. We will set time limits and parameters for surfing.
• Evaluate the flow of our days. Both of us will be making adjustments to school outside the confines of school hours. I tend to charge forth in the a.m. but need to sit back and feel his vibe without giving him all power in scheduling. Does it matter if he doesn't do math first? For me, yes. For him, who knows? Perhaps he will be best served by playing an interactive game or doing an art project first. I know this will be a challenge for me--being open to free flow yet not letting the day be a complete wash. 
• Rearrange furniture. This might seem odd, but I can already see that we need to think through our work spaces and storage issues. If he spends any amount of time on the computer, I would like to be able to sit near him and either assist him or work on my laptop. Right now, there is no comfortable place in the office for a second person. Also, I hate clutter. How will we tame the books, papers, projects, supplies, and whatnot? We will think this through together and make adjustments.
• Remember that we have lots of time. We are committed to homeschool through his eighth grade year. That is almost a year and a half. Breathe. Take it slow.

While none of the above feels like school, I need to remember that it is. He will be using critical thinking to solve problems, visualizing spaces, learning to categorize, and using technology--all worthwhile skills.  I will let you know how it goes.

Chronicle of a Struggling Learner

On Monday I begin my new life as a homeschooling mom. It's a midstream change, kind of sudden but really not.

Our journey with my third child began years ago, probably around his second grade year (now seventh) when I noted that he tended to skip small words while reading aloud. Eventually this translated to poor performance on tests although I didn't make the connection until much later. Teachers warned me not to compare his performance with my first two, both top of class students.

I guess I kept hoping that he would catch up but each year was the same drill. He started strong then crashed by about week seven or eight, usually around the time of the first comprehensive test. On a hunch, in fifth grade, I read aloud some questions from his "F" test. To my surprise, he answered me with 100% accuracy. The kid was not dumb.

Fortunately for us, we have an optometrist in our town who tests for a peculiar learning issue. As my son subjected himself to a battery of "games," I was shocked to discover how much he missed as I followed along. In a nutshell, he has a visual processing deficit, not correctable by lenses. It goes much deeper in the heart of his brain.

I discovered that my son had adapted to this, unconsciously, by suppressing the receiving center for one of his eyes. Think about reading a book with the type on the two facing pages overlapping, even slightly. This is how text looked to him. The brain is a marvelous organ and it does what it needs to do when taxed. Unfortunately, in this case, it staunched the dimension needed for information to make sense. Without a 3D understanding of text, my son struggled to get visual pictures, to organize information, to memorize--in short, to learn.

Schools have tests for struggling learners but they do not test for this particular issue and, I found, do not really consider this a "valid" problem. It doesn't fit their box and they do not have specialists or programs ready to address this deficit. Coupled with the fact that my son could, with my help, make passing grades, he never failed enough to get the magical IEP (nor did we particularly want him attached to the little pink folder).

I kept hoping that he would manage his learning using the sills he learned in an intensive vision therapy program (our dime) while I alerted teachers to particular hot spots. It hasn't worked despite my hopes and intentions. Denial is bliss, but truth is probably better though inconvenient.

How can I expect a teacher to buffet my son amidst a class of 35 students, some with severe learning disabilities and specifically outlined objectives, as well as top learners who regularly linger on the edge of boredom in the classroom? I couldn't do it. Teachers must teach to the masses and pray that their teaching method reaches the majority of students.

What tipped the scale for me was the dull undercurrent of concern about my son's social life. He has never been in "trouble" but he continues to disturb me with his friend choices and I see behaviors that, while small and maybe even age-appropriate (by the world standards), will grow in the wrong direction. For a kid who suffers in the classroom, there is a great desire to succeed at something. That something isn't always positive. Kids like this are grouped with underachievers, not the best friend pool. They lag schoolmates in understanding so they embellish, pose as characters to garner approval, or simply lie. It creates a disturbing social cycle.

I finally had to ask. Why am I sending my son to school for seven hours each day? He isn't gaining more than a fraction of an academic year each year and he isn't thriving socially. Why is he there? It's sobering to admit, but the honest truth is that he was there for me, to give me a break. I have subjected him to a daylong babysitter--and not really a good one.

So here we are. Starting homeschool. After the initial resistance to the idea, my son is excited and relieved that he is about to be released from the grind of school. We anticipate spending the first several weeks in a detox process, if you will, learning what learning can be outside the confines of a traditional environment.

My challenge will be to teach a right brain child from my own left and linear brain.

This will be a journey, thus the name of my blog. Regel, in Hebrew, means journey. Also tied to the word is enduring. I know I can do this but I also know my own limitations and tendencies. I figure that if I am going to suffer, I should share my suffering with others. After all, what is suffering for but that others can learn?

I hope my friends will follow my journey, but more than that, I pray that other parents with struggling learners will find their way here and that I can encourage them through our experiences, successes, failures, blunders, and joys. Our kids our worth it. My son is worth it. This could possibly be the greatest investment I have ever made as a parent.

As I read just this morning, "Rest assured that God never leaves a willing servant with nothing to do. The alternate opportunity He has in mind will yield bigger fruit, more satisfaction, and greater glory for Him." Jeremiah 10:23-24 NLT

Blessings. CS